Keeping Wonderful People in Your Life

Finding a sense of self-worth is oftentimes difficult for some of us.

In an effort to find it, we tend to question our self awareness and our ability to remain fearless when it comes to making friends or keeping the ones we already have.

We make every effort to keep wonderful people in our circle of friends because it reinforces and validates our self-worth, and because it is human nature to feel wanted and loved. We yearn for that feeling of completeness that only another person can afford us through their love, affection and, in some cases, touch.

We want to feel the closeness of others. We want to feel their warmth, their presence, their unfettered emotions entangled with our own. It's only human to yearn all these things.

These feelings, thoughts and emotions are very normal and common for everyone.

Often, the question is “Why can’t I keep wonderful people around me?”

Attracting wonderful people into your life requires a wonderful personality, a magnetic one that exudes positive energy, and, in essence, attracts the people you want around you.

By definition, "wonderful" implies that a person adds value or brings something special to another person's life. 

These are a few things I've done in my life that have helped me keep “wonderful” around me.

Tell someone how wonderful they are.

Telling someone how wonderful they are requires a high level of confidence and purity in your heart. Some of us find this very difficult because we're not used to the idea of saying great things to other people. Partly, because we feel we may be judged or people will think we’re crazy! There is probably some truth to that.

But the truth is that we have to able to verbalize it. If we can’t tell this person how wonderful he/she is, then this person isn’t really that wonderful to you.

So, don’t be scared and say it. This will make this person feel special and, in turn, you will feel so much better about yourself and your relationship with this person.

The key is to create a field of positive energy around the person, so they feel special and wonderful, just as you think they are.

Always accept that not everyone feels the way you do. 

Some people manage their lives differently than you do. More often than not, they may not have the same confidence level you do. So, keep yourself in check.

If you're a high-confidence person, remember to tone it down to the level of comfort with the people you want to keep around you. If your confidence is low, then try to find the most positive thing about the group and feed off that energy to create the level of confidence you're looking for.

Keep in mind that we are all on the same journey to live our lives as best we can. Having you in their lives may be enough for them. So, stay on point and within reasonable exposure with the people you want around you.

Keep your cool and enjoy the party! 

Not everyday will be the same. Some days are better than others. Our emotions and feelings will come through depending on how our day is going. We all wish to have positive days, everyday. No one wants to have a bad day. The truth is that we will have less-than-optimal days, and we have to deal with them.

The goal here is to lighten up and know that we can’t control everything that happens in our lives. But we can control how much people see of the things that bother us.

Get in the moment and refrain from expressing your anger or disgust while everyone else is having a great time.

If you find it difficult to remain engaged and feel your emotions are getting the best of you, then remove yourself for a moment while you gain your composure. A short trip to the restroom or a walk around the venue might help.  You may also remove yourself completely by finding a cool excuse to go home. This will allow you the time to you need to put yourself back together.

We all want to be invited to the next party. Getting left out is no fun.  You’ll be less likely to be invited if people associate your company with negative energy or erratic behavior.

Share your opinions wisely. 

Refrain from being overbearing in your beliefs. Remember that we are all entitled to believe and shape our lives into what we envision it to be. If you have strong beliefs about something, don’t broach the subject; especially if you think it might offend someone in the group.

It’s best to keep the conversation lighthearted and with just enough spice of opinion to give it a dynamic sense of discussion.

“I want to come back and be part of this group.“

If you keep the above statement at the forefront of your mind, you’ll soon realize that staying on point, being brief and less overbearing in your opinions will keep you coming back.

The wonderful people you want in your life will want to keep you in theirs. You will always be part of the group if they find you positive, confident, and conscientious.

Always, think of the next time you want to be back. Putting things into perspective of coming back to meet with the people you want in your life is key to maintaining a proper perspective on your own behavior.

Hope this helps you put some perspective into keeping wonderful people around you. Trust me it isn’t as simple as it sounds. I have to constantly think about these things myself. But like you and everyone else, I am also a “work-in-progress” human.

Consistency is key.

~Frasier